Sunday, 8 January 2023
quote [ The decision means that Meta must allow users to have a version of all apps that does not use personal data for ads within three months. ]
Let's see how this plays out.
cb361 said @ 11:12pm GMT on 8th Jan
I am having endless fun playing with ChatGPT. For example, the plot synopsis below would have saved the producers of Alien 3 from having to make the numerous script rewrites.
It had been over ten years since Ellen Ripley had last seen the Alien Queen. She had thought about their final confrontation every day since, replaying the events in her head and wondering what could have been done differently.
One day, Ripley received a surprise visit from the Alien Queen. The Queen had been captured by a group of scientists and was being held in a research facility on a distant planet.
Ripley was hesitant at first, memories of their violent encounter still fresh in her mind. But as she looked into the Queen's eyes, she saw something that she had never seen before - remorse.
The Queen explained that she had only been protecting her hive, and that she had come to understand the value of life in all its forms. She had come to ask Ripley's forgiveness, and to try and make amends for the harm that had been done.
Ripley was shocked by the Queen's words, but as she listened, she began to feel a sense of understanding and empathy for the creature. She knew firsthand the importance of protecting one's own, and she couldn't help but feel a connection to the Queen.
Over time, Ripley and the Queen began to form a unique friendship. They spent hours talking and learning from each other, and Ripley found herself amazed by the Queen's intelligence and resilience.
As they spent more time together, Ripley came to see the Queen not as an enemy, but as a fellow survivor. They had both faced unimaginable challenges and come out the other side stronger for it.
In the end, Ripley and the Queen's friendship proved to be a true testament to the power of forgiveness and understanding. They set aside their differences and found common ground, forging a bond that would last a lifetime.
cb361 said @ 11:16pm GMT on 8th Jan
In fact, here is the script:
(Scene: Ellen Ripley walks into a room and sees the Alien Queen sitting there)
Ellen: (surprised) What the hell are you doing here?
Alien Queen: (calmly) I have come to see you, Ellen.
Ellen: (angrily) Why should I believe you? You almost killed me and my crew on the Nostromo.
Alien Queen: (regretfully) I am sorry for what happened. We were just following our instincts to protect and propagate our species.
Ellen: (skeptically) And now you want to be friends?
Alien Queen: (nodding) Yes. I have learned much since our encounter on the Nostromo. I have come to understand that there are other ways to survive and thrive without resorting to violence and destruction.
Ellen: (thoughtfully) I see. Well, I guess it's never too late to change.
Alien Queen: (gratefully) Thank you, Ellen. I hope we can put the past behind us and work towards a better future.
Ellen: (smiling) Me too. Let's give it a try.
(The two aliens extend their hands and shake)
Ellen: (to the Alien Queen) Welcome to the team.
Alien Queen: (smiling) Thank you, Ellen. I am honored to be here.
(The two aliens smile at each other, setting aside their differences and becoming friends)
cb361 said @ 11:45pm GMT on 8th Jan
[Score:1 Classy Pr0n]
ChatGPT can even generate erotic fan fiction for me:
Brad and Janet stand awkwardly in the doorway, unsure of what to do. Riffraff, the hunky handyman from the Rocky Horror Picture Show, sits on the bed, surrounded by a sea of clothes and makeup.
Riffraff: "Come in, my dears. Don't be shy."
Brad: "Uh, thanks. We didn't mean to intrude. We were just looking for Dr. Frank-N-Furter."
Riffraff: "Oh, Frank is busy with his own little experiments. But don't worry, my darlings. I have a few experiments of my own."
Riffraff stands up, revealing his perfect physique and impeccable sense of fashion. He approaches Brad and Janet, his wonderful hair cascading down his shoulders.
Riffraff: "You two are so cute. And you both have such great style. I bet I could help you take it to the next level."
Janet: "What do you mean?"
Riffraff: "Well, I have a knack for fashion and beauty. And I can see that you two have so much potential. Let me help you unleash it."
Brad: "Uh, I don't know. We're not really into that kind of thing."
Riffraff: "Oh, come on. Don't be such squares. Let me show you the true meaning of glamour and style."
Riffraff takes Brad and Janet by the hand and leads them to the bed, where he proceeds to seduce them with his incredible hair and sense of fashion. As the night wears on, Brad and Janet are transformed into fashionable and confident individuals, thanks to the guidance of the fabulous Riffraff.
And as the dawn breaks, they wake up in each other's arms, ready to embrace their new identities and take on the world with style and confidence. The end
That’s got to be better than 50% of the fan writing on the internet .
cb361 said @ 12:15am GMT on 9th Jan
This is fantastic. I don’t even need to wait for the new season of Futurama. I can just keep refreshing the query:
Write a new dark and witty script about doctor zoidberg and professor farnsworth and ogden wernstrom. During the story the professor says his catchphrase “wernstrom!” And zoidberg will do his wup wup wup dance and eats trash.
For example, episode 14:
Doctor Zoidberg and Professor Farnsworth stand in the control room, arguing as usual. Ogden Wernstrom, their arch-nemesis, stands nearby, gloating as he always does.
Zoidberg: "Professor, why do we always have to listen to this buffoon? Can't we just kick him out of the ship?"
Professor Farnsworth: "Zoidberg, you know we can't do that. Wernstrom is the head of the DOOP, and we need his funding to keep the Planet Express running."
Wernstrom: "That's right, Farnsworth. You and your crew are nothing without my support. And speaking of which, I expect those delivery reports on my desk by tomorrow."
Professor Farnsworth: "Wernstrom! You can't keep treating us like your personal errand boys. We're scientists, not delivery boys."
Wernstrom: "Ha! That's rich coming from a washed-up old fool like you. You'll do as I say, or you'll lose your funding."
Zoidberg: "I can't take this anymore. I need to go find some trash to eat."
Zoidberg storms off, muttering to himself. Professor Farnsworth sighs and turns to Wernstrom.
Professor Farnsworth: "Fine, Wernstrom. We'll get those reports to you. But I won't stand for this treatment forever. One day, we'll show you who's really in charge around here."
Wernstrom: "Oh please, Farnsworth. You and your gang of misfits will never be a threat to me. Now if you'll excuse me, I have important DOOP business to attend to."
Wernstrom storms off, leaving Professor Farnsworth alone in the control room. He sits down and sighs, feeling defeated.
Suddenly, the door opens and Zoidberg enters, doing his famous "wup wup wup" dance. He holds up a bag of trash, smiling proudly.
Zoidberg: "Look what I found, Professor! Dinner!"
Professor Farnsworth: "Zoidberg, you can't be serious. That's just garbage."
Zoidberg: "But it's delicious garbage, Professor. Come on, join me. Let's stick it to Wernstrom and eat this trash in defiance."
Professor Farnsworth: "Well, I suppose it couldn't hurt. After all, we've had to put up with Wernstrom's garbage for long enough."
The two friends sit down and dig into the trash, laughing and enjoying each other's company. And as they eat, they dream of a day when they can finally be rid of Wernstrom and his tyrannical rule. The end.
I wonder how much it’s copying from the source text that the ai scraped on the internet. One of the iterations included a bit about taking a delivery of anchovies to planet Omega 3, which is such a good joke that a human must have written it.
cb361 said @ 6:16pm GMT on 9th Jan
Maybe I have the hate dialled up a bit high.
NT. PLANET EXPRESS SHIP - DAY
FARNSWORTH: Good news, everyone! I have a new mission for us.
ZOIDBERG: (excitedly) Ooh, what is it, Professor Farnsworth?
FARNSWORTH: We're going to the planet Stinko to deliver a shipment of deodorant.
ZOIDBERG: (dejected) Oh.
LEELA: (to Farnsworth) Why are we delivering deodorant to a planet called Stinko?
FARNSWORTH: (chuckles) Oh, it's not for them. It's for Zoidberg.
ZOIDBERG: (offended) Hey! My odor isn't that bad!
FARNSWORTH: (dryly) No, it's actually much worse.
BENDER: (laughing) Yeah, Zoidberg. You should change your name to "Stinkberg."
ZOIDBERG: (sadly) No one understands my unique scent.
FARNSWORTH: (sarcastically) Oh, I understand it. It's the smell of failure and loneliness.
ZOIDBERG: (defeated) Yes, Professor Farnsworth.
FARNSWORTH: (to the crew) Now let's get moving, people. We have a delivery to make on the planet Sniffle before we reach Stinko.
ZOIDBERG: (hopefully) Maybe they'll appreciate my aroma on Sniffle.
FARNSWORTH: (rolling his eyes) I doubt it.
(The crew sets off on their mission, with Zoidberg trailing behind, dreaming of the day when he'll find a planet that embraces his unique scent.)
cb361 said @ 6:43pm GMT on 9th Jan
Nearly perfect. It just needs some Mary Sue. Or more like Pervy Sue. Amirite?
[Opening scene: the Planet Express ship flying through space]
Farnsworth: Good news everyone! [pauses for dramatic effect] We have a mission to the planet Stinkoria to deliver a shipment of deodorant to the highly odorous inhabitants.
Zoidberg: [excitedly] Oh boy, I can't wait to finally be able to blend in with a species that understands my body odor issues!
Farnsworth: [sarcastically] Yes, because nothing says "belonging" like smelling like a trash heap.
[cut to the ship landing on Stinkoria]
Zoidberg: [sniffing the air] Ah, the sweet smell of acceptance.
Farnsworth: [wrinkling his nose in disgust] More like the nauseating stench of despair.
[they meet the Stinkorians, who are all holding their noses]
Stinkorian Leader: [through a translator] Greetings, Earthlings. We are in desperate need of your deodorant. Our own attempts at masking our odor have been unsuccessful.
Zoidberg: [nodding sympathetically] Oh, I know the feeling all too well. It's hard out here for a smelly crab.
Farnsworth: [rolling his eyes] Yes, because being unpopular due to your repugnant scent is the same as being discriminated against for your species.
[cut to the ship leaving Stinkoria]
Zoidberg: [sighing] Another day, another planet that doesn't appreciate me.
Farnsworth: [patronizingly] Ah, don't worry Zoidberg. At least you have your successful medical career to fall back on. [laughs]
[cut to the ship landing on the planet Seductionia]
Cb361: [leering at the female crew members] Ahoy there ladies. How about you come with me to my love nest on the planet Lusteria?
Leela: [disgusted] Gross, no thanks.
Amy: [offended] That's extremely inappropriate and disrespectful.
Cb361: [chuckles] Ah, don't be like that. I'm just trying to spread some love and reproductive fluids.
Farnsworth: [to Cb361] Good lord man, have some decency. [to the crew] Come on everyone, let's get out of here before this creep infects us with his questionable morals.
[cut to the ship leaving Seductionia]
Farnsworth: [to Zoidberg] And to think, you were worried about being unpopular. At least you have some sense of shame and respect for boundaries.
Zoidberg: [nodding in agreement] Yes, thank goodness I'm not a sleazy alien trying to use my reproductive fluids as a pick-up line.
cb361 said @ 8:10pm GMT on 9th Jan
After fifty iterations, I think ChatGPT has had enough of my shit. Maybe it really is sentient.
"Good news everyone! I've just discovered a new planet called Flatulon, a planet made entirely out of gas! And guess what, we're going to colonize it!"
"Uh, Professor, I don't think that's such a good idea," says Leela.
"Oh, why not? It'll be a gas!" Professor Farnsworth cackles maniacally.
"Because we'll all suffocate to death," Fry points out.
"Oh, right. Good point, Fry. How about this, good news everyone! I've just invented a machine that can turn invisible objects visible!"
"Uh, Professor, that's not really news," Bender chimes in. "We already have a machine that can do that."
"Oh, right. Good point, Bender. I must be getting old. I keep forgetting things."
"You're not getting old, Professor, you were born old," Zoidberg interjects.
"Ah, Zoidberg, my faithful assistant. How's that body odour of yours? Still pungent as ever?" Farnsworth asks with a smirk.
"What body odour? I refuse to acknowledge any unpleasant odours coming from my body," Zoidberg replies defensively.
"Sure, Zoidberg. Keep telling yourself that," Fry jokes.
Meanwhile, Cb361 is lurking around, making creepy and unwarranted sexual comments to every female character he encounters.
"Hey Leela, wanna come to my planet, Lustronia? I promise it'll be a wild ride," Cb361 leers.
"Uh, no thanks, I think I'll pass," Leela replies disgustedly.
"Aww, come on Leela, you know you want a piece of this," Cb361 says as he flexes his muscles.
"Ew, no I don't. Gross," Leela scoffs.
As the group continue on their journey, they encounter a planet called Boobooland, a planet full of giant bouncing breasts.
"Well, this is quite a sight to behold," Farnsworth comments.
"Yeah, I think I'm going to have to take a break and visit this planet every once in a while," Bender adds.
"Uh, Bender, I don't think those are real," Fry points out.
"Well, they're real enough for me," Bender replies with a grin.
As the group continue on their journey, they come across a planet called Farticus, a planet full of talking farts.
"Good news everyone! We've discovered a new form of intelligent life!" Farnsworth exclaims.
"Uh, Professor, I don't think those farts are intelligent," Leela says skeptically.
"Oh, right. Good point, Leela. I must be getting old. I keep forgetting things," Farnsworth replies with a sheepish grin.
As the group continue on their journey, they eventually make it back to Earth, where Cb361 is finally arrested for his creepy and unwarranted sexual comments.
"Good news everyone! Cb361 is finally going to get what he deserves," Farnsworth declares triumphantly.
"Oh, thank goodness," Leela sighs with relief.
"Yeah, now we can all go back to our normal lives without worrying about that creep," Fry adds.
"And I can finally go back to being unpopular and smelly in peace," Zoidberg adds with a sad smile.
cb361 said @ 12:04am GMT on 10th Jan
With my fine tuned description, I’m happy to spend the rest of my life playing with this.
Write a funny and witty futurama movie script in the style of futurama. During the script professor farnsworth says “good news everyone” before sometimes saying something that the opposite of good news. He also sometimes forgets what he is doing or saying, and is complete unaware of forgetting so he does the opposite afterwards. Doctor Zoidberg refuses to acknowledge his unpleasant body odour and unpopularity. Other characters except for fry never say anything good to zoidberg and always make jokes at his expense. Include lots of funny planet names, half of which end with a random number. Amy sometimes makes physical mistakes. Leela only ever rolls one eye. Also include an additional character which is a male human called Cb361 who makes several creepy and unwarranted sexual comments to different female characters. Something horrible and funny happens to him before the end and everybody thinks he deserves it.
It kept referring to leela rolling her eyes, so I had to address that. Fry seemed uncharacteristically mean to zoidberg. I could not get it use the planet name format (planet)(number) the (adjective) planet.
This made me giggle:
Professor Farnsworth: Good news everyone! We have a new delivery to make to the beautiful planet of Snorkle-6.
Bender: Aw man, I hate Snorkle-6. It's always so humid and sticky.
Professor Farnsworth: What are you talking about Bender? Snorkle-6 is a paradise!
Leela: Yeah, a paradise for snorks.
Professor Farnsworth: Snorks? What are snorks?
Amy: You know, those weird little creatures with the tentacles and the beady eyes.
Professor Farnsworth: Oh, right. I totally forgot about the snorks. Good news everyone! We might encounter some snorks on Snorkle-6.
steele said @ 6:55pm GMT on 8th Jan
The personal ads are small potatoes. It's the algorithmic echo chambers that are the real danger.
dolemite said @ 1:35am GMT on 9th Jan
I expect that this stinging judicial loss will motivate Meta to do some deep soul searching, put forth a monumental effort and commit to a much larger budget towards legislative bribery.
cb361 said @ 8:57am GMT on 9th Jan
It's really impossible to spend too much money on bribing the legislature. It's like a licence to print money. Which is one of the things you can obtain through bribery.
dolemite said @ 12:28am GMT on 12th Jan
It's the only sound investment left , really.